A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning.The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and said, “How should I know, that’s 200 miles from here!” and hung up.
The husband said, “Who was that?” The wife said, “I don’t know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear.”
Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, “Hmm, this person looks familiar.” The second blonde says, “Here, let me see!” So the first blonde hands her the compact. The second one looks in the mirror and says, “You dummy, it’s me!”
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead.
Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with grief.
She takes the gun and puts it to her head. The boyfriend yells, “No, honey, don’t do it!!!”
The blonde replies, “Shut up, you’re next!”
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says, “Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them.”
A friend says, “OK, what’s the capital of Wisconsin?” The blonde replies, “Oh, that’s easy: W.”
What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant
“Is it mine?”
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA freshman, sat in her US government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about. Bambi pondered the question then finally said, “That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware”
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.
The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby was the first to respond.
As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps.
Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, “I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman.”
The Foreign Currency Exchange (or Forex, Spot market, or Cash Market) is a group of over 4500 world banks that are connected electronically.
It is different from the Stock Market because there is no centralized trading place. The Stock market trades $100 billion daily, the US Treasury Bond deals with $300 billion daily, but the Forex deals with $3 TRILLION daily! Because of this, it is much easier to get in and out of a trade.
The Forex open Sunday evening at 7pm EDT and closes Friday evening at 4PM EDT.
There are 3 sessions of trading:
- Asia 7 PM EDT to 6 AM EDT
- Europe 2 AM EDT to 11 AM EDT
- United States 8 AM EDT to 5 PM EDT
To trade the Forex, you need to open an account with a Forex broker, fund the account, then place a trade. This is easy to do if you have Internet access. You will also need charting software so that you can analyze the market.
90% of traders fail, and only 10% of traders succeed. The reason why so many fail, is because they fail to get a good education. They fail to secure a good mentor. I have found some excellent mentors at Market Traders Institute.
They have kept things simple and logical. They have always been available for me to ask questions. When I set up a trade, I can go into a live chat, and ask their opinion. They do live analysis of the market 5 times a day to help me see where the currencies are going and how I should be trading. They have always been patient with me.
I also have access to other traders that are learning in the MTI chatroom. I have made many friends in the chatroom and we help each other.
Question: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Answers. . . .
Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.
Einstein dies and goes to heaven only to be informed that his room is not yet ready. “I hope you will not mind waiting in a dormitory. We are very sorry, but it’s the best we can do and you will have to share the room with others he is told by the doorman.
Einstein says that this is no problem at all and that there is no need to make such a great fuss. So the doorman leads him to the dorm. They enter and Albert is introduced to all of the present inhabitants.
“See, Here is your first room mate. He has an IQ of 180!” “That”s wonderful!” says Albert. “We can discuss mathematics!”
“And here is your second room mate. His IQ is 150!” “That’s wonderful!” says Albert. “We can discuss physics!”
“And here is your third room mate. His IQ is 100!” “That’s wonderful! We can discuss the latest plays at the theater!”
Just then another man moves out to capture Albert’s hand and shake it. “I’m your last room mate and I’m sorry, but my IQ is only 80.” Albert smiles back at him and says, “So, where do you think the stock market is heading?”
A motorist was driving by a Texas ranch, hit and killed a calf that was crossing the road. The driver went to the owner of the calf and explained what had happened and he then asked what the animal was worth.
The most popular currencies along with their symbols are shown below:
For years ‘n years they told me,
“Be careful of your breasts.
Don’t ever squeeze or bruise them,
And give them monthly tests.”
A wealthy old Gentleman decides to go on a hunting safari in Africa, taking his faithful, elderly dog named Killer, along for the company.
Learning the forex is a lot like learning to become a chef.
First, discover what kind of chef you would like to be. Second, learn how to prepare your ingredients. Third, choose the best recipe for you. Fourth, decide if you need to add or omit certain ingredients to suit your taste. Finally, work on the recipe to perfect it.
How does this apply to the forex?
Let’s start with an uptrend. As we are going up, the candles are waving up and down. To find a good entry to go up, we want to wait for the candles to go down, and start going up. After we see 3 candles of retracement, we draw a counter trendline (down) and wait for a good bullish candle to break this. We prefer a candle that is at least 75% body (25% wick).
We put our stop 10 pips below the low. We use fibs or support/resistance to determine our limit.
Or you can set a very high limit (1000 pips) and move the stop loss every time a higher low is formed. Then you can ride this wave as long as it lasts (surfing the forex)! HANG 10!
Let’s go to the downtrend next. As we are going down, the candles are waving up and down. To find a good entry to go up, we want to wait for the candles to go up, and start going down. After we see 3 candles of retracement, we draw a counter trendline (up) and wait for a good bearish candle to break this. We prefer a candle that is at least 75% body (25% wick).
We put our stop 15 pips above the high. We use fibs or support/resistance to determine our limit.
Or you can set a very high limit (1000 pips) and move the stop loss every time a lower high is formed. Then you can ride this wave as long as it lasts (surfing the forex)! HANG 10! (Can you hear the Beach Boys in the background… listen very carefully).